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Having spent 25 years evaluating writing samples from high school students, I long ago developed the somewhat neurotic habit of being judgmental about other peoples’ writing. I no longer get paid to judge, of course, except through moments of disgust, or sometimes glee, but two categories continue to feed my habit: advertising, and political slogans.

For example, on the back cover of a recent Leatherworkers’ and Saddlers’ Journal, Tandy Leather Corporation expounds “Introducing new, everyday HONEST pricing.” Now, maybe there’s some recent accusation of price-fixing or something that Tandy is trying to get ahead of, I don’t know. More likely, Tandy just paid some ad firm a boatload of cash to come up with a new ad. Everyone to whom I’ve mentioned it has some snarky reply along the lines of – you guessed it – “Finally!” or “So all the old prices were dishonest?” or “Fifty years of overpricing caught up to ‘em, huh?”

I can envision the person who dreamed up this beauty. Male, smart, young, unshaved, owning barely enough skin to contain all his tattoos, boat shoes and no socks, working at hyper speed, really scornful of his fusty English teachers back in high school. But Tandy is a big, big corporation. Somewhere up that corporate ladder there’s bound to be a less tattooed, less hyper, less scornful executive type who gave final approval to this ad. You’d think somebody at that level would be more cautious about the company image.

Oh well, at least now we know we can trust Tandy.

An ad phrase commonly used to sell cleaning products, OTC drugs, and time-saving techy toys begins something like “Nothing works faster than ….”

I always have to ask, “So why would anybody buy this product if it is out-performed by doing nothing at all?”

Just adding one little word – “else” – would make all the difference.

I know this pickiness doesn’t infect a lot of people in the reading public. Most people probably just ignore the possible nuances, double meanings, all that, at least until their own integrity or intelligence is blatantly challenged. Or maybe, like me, they enjoy making snarky replies. But pickiness truly is important in language use, whether the public thinks so or not, most especially within the realm of public discourse. That’s something lawyers understand, particularly working with contracts. One little word, one misspelling, can cause myriads of problems. That’s also why spin-doctoring is big business.

It’s so painfully true with political slogans. There’s a bumper sticker which says, “I can’t wait to vote for Trump again.” I don’t doubt the sincerity of those who plaster this on their vehicles. It’s their right (good ol’ First Amendment), and I’ll bet some even have thoughtful reasons for taking this view. But why can’t they see how vulnerable to comebacks they become with sloganeering (which is, by the way, one of the major techniques of propaganda, but has never been listed as a proper or useful technique of logical debate.) I can just hear some smarty replying: “I can’t wait to shoot myself in the foot again.” Or, “I can’t wait to hit my hand with a hammer again.”

There’s a sign along Highway 200 which says, “Truth is treason in an empire of lies.” It appeared during Obama’s presidency, and I worried about it for several years, wondering what truths and lies I had misunderstood, and what actually constituted an empire of lies.

More recently this sign was joined side-by-side with one which says “Trump is my President. Get over it.” I wonder what the smarties are saying now.

Ron Rude,

Plains